Thursday, July 21, 2011

Selfish Walk

On the onset, let me just mention that this is the first post of the  the Jaywalker, away from Lucknow. I am writing this from Agra. The second thing I must mention here is that I am writing this post after such a long break for two reasons: One, I was working in Agra for the last almost 20months & 2, while working, I never had the time, let alone energy to contemplate & write. Now for the actual post...

As I go about my daily routine of chores at home and work in office, I have a habit of noticing people around me, not just interact with them. Those who know me, and KNOW me well would be nodding here. Going about thus, I have developed a few theories on human behavior on my own. Now I don't know if these are standard theories of psychology or they  pertain to the paranormal plain that I have in my head but nevertheless, I have come to rely on them broadly in my daily routine. One such observation which has subsequently become a theory is people are selfish. Before you go all sarcastic on me on this trivial revelation, hear (read) me out.
All people are at the core, social people and as thus survive in a community consisting of our peers, acquaintances, friends & family. These social circles not just guide us in our daily behavior, they also keep us sane and secure in many ways. One effect of these circles is that people follow a code of morality & ethics which has been ingrained by the people around them; initially family then friends & peers and so on.. Our values keep changing much like our circles. But if given the right setting, the very people who are virtuous would actually act selfishly. Even when in normal circumstances they act selfish and we take their behavior as normal. Why is that? It is because of the ingrained animal selfishness that we all have subconsciously and use as a survival tool. Let me give you a corporate example: Any negotiation continues until both sides are satisfied that they got the best deal, true? In a bargain, how can both sides emerge winners? One must loose, right? Wrong. In an negotiation the perception of the parties matter and not the outcome. So long as they both perceive that they are gaining from the deal, it is signed, sealed and delivered without any hiccups. Where is the selfish angle to this you ask. Any deal that we make is for selfish reasons. The person pushing the deal forward stands to gain the business & quite possibly a handsome incentive for the closed deal. The person taking the deal stands to profit from the deal by taking and utilizing or selling the offered product. Thus, even though their could have been a better bargain price for the taker, or a higher price for the maker, both arrive at a common midway where both of them are loosing a part of the profit (in economic terms, some opportunity costs too) while still going ahead with the deal.
Let us take another example. In a family, people work out of love and not selfishly. But yet we see people doing selfish things. Here one can say that love itself is the most selfish emotion. We do something out of love because it makes us feel better. Thus, it is a selfish act, when we act because of love.
Through this roller coaster of arguments, you might have lost the point so let me put it forth again; We are selfish at the most basic & core level. Anyone who says he is not selfish is lying (he may be oblivious to the it). The best thing we can do is accept & endorse that we are selfish instead of continuously trying figure out ways around it.